Owning a Submissive is Never Really on My Radar

In the years I’ve been part of the BDSM community, I’ve yet to officially own a sub. Owning a submissive simply is not my current priority. There has been one sub I thought I wanted to own after getting to know them and there have been countless that have started the consideration process that did not make it through. I have no problem with this. The deep, sensual connection I seek will find me when the time is right and that’s fine with me.

A D/s relationship is complex. A piece of divine. Insatiable at times. It is a bonding of people, souls, needs and wants. Claiming a submissive as mine or a submissive even wanting to be owned by Me is a very important step to take. It’s so important that I have very strict standards for those that wish to be privileged with the title of “Goddess Ro’s.”

This being said, any time a submissive has asked me to own them out of the blue, I always decline and they never get a chance. Ever. Anyone that is eager to be a long-term servant of Mine would know how a proper D/s relationship requires time to get to know one another. They would know that I would immediately say no and they would opt to fill out my servant form, buy clips or session with me instead. They would get to know how I do what I do and see if they like it.

And if they do like it, they come back. They session again. They buy more clips. They pay for my full attention so they can get any pressing questions answered

For all you know, your budget doesn’t fit My interests. Maybe you aren’t a fan of My punishments. Maybe we simply do not mesh and things feel too awkward to proceed. Maybe you realize in getting to know me that you do not seek ownership but just want to do sessions or buy clips or pay for tasks. You would not know that if you jumped into ownership with no insight on your own likes and dislikes.

I may be a flexible person in many cases, but if you expect my hard limits to change for you you would be wrong (as would anyone who wanted you to engage in your hard limits knowing they were your hard limits). You would not know any of this if I simply owned you without any prior consideration.

Why would you want to be owned by someone you don’t know? Someone who doesn’t share a single interest? What pleasure would be had if you had nothing the person you wanted to serve wanted? Maybe you find joy in being incompatible, but I do not and thus do not push incompatible people to become incompatible with me. Sure, over time you can find out you like certain kinks you did not know you liked before- there are subs whose service led me to loving a few kinks that I hold dear to my heart now- but if the energies between us do not allow for a space for you to be comfortable to do that, it would be a waste wouldn’t it?

If I cannot trust you, of course I would never open up to you. I would never be able to fully please you because I’d never be fully present. Considering this, I do not even consider owning a sub unless they’ve served me for at least 6 months.

I could never own a submissive for the rest of my life and I’d still be a Dominant. A submissive could never be owned and would still be a submissive. A switch that has never been collared or collared another is still a switch. Ownership isn’t a requirement of D/s and if you or someone you interact with believe it is the end all be all, then you need to reflect.

BDSM is about growth. It’s about opening up to yourself and (if you wish) others. It’s about introspection and discovery of interests. It does not require ownership. It requires trust more than anything. Trust in yourself, trust in those you play with.

It’s not like you can’t enjoy BDSM if ownership isn’t your priority.

There are subs who serve for long periods of time without any interest in being owned. They send, submit, indulge and it’s fine. There are subs who only want to do sessions every now and then. There are subs who only want to be human ATMs that you can empty out just because they like being used and nothing more. There are subs who get off on being able to be useful to multiple people and do their best to be the best community plaything they can be.

People are multifaceted and that’s okay. My favorite part of my ongoing journey in BDSM is seeing exactly how complex I am and others are.

If you’ve eager to be a servant of Mine, make sure you fill out the form here!

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